Values

            What are my two core values? When we discussed this in class most of my peers put something along the lines of family or faith, but, although these two are important in my life, they aren’t my core values, the values I live and breathe in my daily tasks. My two core values are discipline and success.

            People shared in class what their values were and, as I said, most of them dealt with something along the lines of faith and family. I sat there feeling like a horrible human being for not even including any values that dealt with happiness or love or faith or family, even when we narrowed down our list of 32 to 8. I left class with a sense of selfishness and disappointment as a human. However, as a few days have gone by and my values simmered in my head, I realized how much these values are the epitome of myself. Discipline and success truly are who I am.

            I have written about my running before. I run twice a day, everyday. I am to the point where I am running six to ten miles a day, along with doing a weight workout and ab workout. I lose an hour of sleep each day to do this. Every day I wonder if it is really, really worth getting out of bed to go run. And yet, there I am, running the same four roads I always do. Sometimes I choose to get in a workout rather than eating. I am very disciplined, almost too disciplined I think, when it comes to working out.

             I am also very disciplined when it comes to school. I study so much more than I allow myself to hang out with friends. I get to class twenty minutes early at least when I can. I do my work as soon as possible when it is assigned. I sacrifice sleep to make sure my work is the best it can be. I work very hard on my assignments, and I don’t procrastinate or take shortcuts. Sometimes I will tell myself I have earned a break, and I end up just getting back to work because it would be better for me not to—I don’t deserve it. A friend the other day asked if I wanted to play video games instead of writing my paper. I said no, and he asked why as I could just do it later. I realized how disciplined I was by how appalled I felt when he said I could simply, “do it later”. Do it later?????? WHAT?????? One does not simply do it later.    

            I am very stressed about my future. I worry constantly about how I will be able to provide for myself, especially with the issue of money. I am very focused on succeeding now to be able to financially support myself later on. One of my main mottos is: What you get done now is less you have to do later. I selfishly believe that succeeding and having money is more important than being happy. I know it is stupid to think this way, but I do. I run so much to succeed in accepting myself; I work so hard to succeed in making a more secure future for myself. I do this by being disciplined. These are my core values.

            The things I want to accomplish in my four years of college will come about through my values. I want to figure out what I want to do for the rest of my life, and by studying and going through classes I will use trial and error to find my niche. I want to become braver and stronger, as I am so prone to panic attacks in situations that I am not in control. I will succeed through discipline of practicing and forcing myself into uncomfortable situations.

            My mission statement is that through discipline, I will be able to succeed in becoming a stronger, more brave person. I will hone my abilities to be the best I can be at whatever I end up doing to help myself and others around me.